Friday, January 16th, marks my one year Optifast anniversary. While this is a great occasion to cheer, I have to admit that I’ve found myself slacking and lacking since the weekend. Perhaps it’s the bitter cold weather and my primal urgings to bulk up against the cold, or perhaps I needed a break in my normally healthy routine. Whatever the reason, I’ve been kind of naughty this week. Saturday was my last gym visit, I’ve eaten several meals that certainly aren’t on my plan, and raided my daughter’s “hidden” stash of Christmas chocolates in the freezer. (Did you know that just one Ghirardelli Milk Chocolate Caramel square has 80 calories? They look way too small to be that dangerous!)
Today, I’m catching myself before I fall into a sea of subs, burgers, fries, chocolate, and hopeless inactivity, because, unfortunately, it is easy to go there even after so much work to reach my goal weight. I’m determined to check myself before I wreck myself and here’s my plan:
Forgive myself and cross my name off of the naughty list
Get out my measuring cup, measuring spoons and food scale–and use them.
Start packing my lunch, dinner, and snacks when I go out. Relying on finding something healthy at a restaurant isn’t working as well as knowing the exact calorie count and portion size of what I pack.
Find some new ways for my husband and I to have fun when we go out. (Any suggestions, blogging buddies?) Lately, now that it’s so cold out, our dates have all been in restaurants.
Make an appointment with my trainer. While my weight loss doctor and counselor provide polite, verbal motivation, my trainer, Olivia will give me great advice while kicking my ass into shape. Truthfully, sometimes I just need my ass kicked.
Reduce the size of my nut sack. I LOVE nuts and derive a portion of my daily protein intake from them. However, I know I’ve been overdoing it with my nut grazing lately. Instead of storing my daily serving in a sandwich bag, I’m switching to the smaller snack-sized baggie. Even though it’s smaller, the fullness of the baggie makes me feel like I’m having a bigger serving. (Hooray for ample nut sacks!!)
Get the junk out of my house. I know I’m not good with resisting temptation when it comes to snack foods. My best bet in avoiding them is to not invite them into my house in the first place.
Speaking of anniversaries, my very first blog-iversary for The Ravenously Disappearing Woman is coming up on January 25th, and I’m trying to decide the best way to celebrate it. Any good ideas? Perhaps I could have a contest? Maybe I could post some bikini shots? (totally joking– I haven’t owned a bikini since the 90s!) Maybe I could do a video post, or perhaps something crazier! I welcome your good ideas–the more outrageous–the better!
Stevia-laced coffee and a healthy bowl of Fiber One cereal; this is my usual morning. However for the past three wake-ups, holiday elves (let’s blame it on them) have been treating me to slices of pie or Christmas cookies and a lovely coffee topped with whipped cream. Those silly “elves” have also been sabotaging my other meals, too, and “forcing” me to eat Christmas dinner leftovers. Yesterday, I called their bluff and took the leftovers to my daughter’s house.
The good news is, that three days of feasting hasn’t taken much of a toll on my progress or success. I decided to not give myself any restrictions this holiday. Restrictions make you feel like you’ve failed when a sugar cookie “accidentally falls into your mouth. Truth be told, given carte blanche in the kitchen actually helped me this season. I can’t pack it in like I used to, and didn’t really end up eating the copious amounts of food that I thought I would. It takes the consumption of 3,500 calories to gain a pound. Fortunately, a health metabolism burns those calories, and as of this morning, I only weigh 133 lbs. Holiday victory is still mine!
Today, it’s back to the gym and “so long” to sugar! Will I indulge on New Year’s Eve? Of course!
Speaking of New Year’s, I began working on my new list of goals for 2015 last night. 2014 was such an amazing year that I expect 2015 to be even better! So far, I hope to:
Find an awesome job
Rid myself of debt
Get physically stronger
Create my crafting business
So what about you, dear readers? Did you thoroughly enjoy your holiday treats? Have you made any goals for 2015? Tell me about it! 🙂
Hello all! I’ve been really bad about posting lately, so I thought I’d play catch up today. Here’s what I’ve been up to lately:
Celebrating: Friday was my future son-in-law’s last day of college classes. As soon as grades come out the week after next, he’ll officially have a communications degree in digital film making with a minor in graphic design. Last night, we celebrated his accomplishments with a delicious spread of his favorites; fresh, raw veggies & dip, homemade guacamole and chips, and grilled, Korean chicken on a stick. We had a film festival featuring most of the films that he made during his years in school, and then finished off the evening with an amazing chocolate mocha cake from a nearby bakery. Don’t worry, I had far more grilled chicken and veggies than I did cake, but I did enjoy a nice slice. The best announcement at our party is that he has a job interview this Tuesday for an editing position! (Keep your fingers crossed for him!)
Holiday Décor vs. Kitties: I love the holidays! We put our tree up the Sunday after Thanksgiving and the cats have been super-duper delighted about it. So delighted that we’ve had to resort to shaking a can of coins at them to keep them from eating the branches. They watch me pick up the can, and know I’m about to terrify them, yet they still can’t help taking a nibble or knocking off an ornament.
Remember, the burlap garland I was making for my tree? My other kitty decided that it was delicious. So delicious that it now resides atop my oldest daughter’s fireplace mantle! Those crazy kitties!
Maintenance: My weight maintenance is still going well. I’m hovering between 132-135 pounds and am continuing to work on my core strength and muscle-building. With this being my first holiday season on maintenance, I’m trying to find a balance between enjoying the treats of the season and making smart choices. On thing I won’t be doing this year is making Christmas cookies. I know that sounds Scrooge-like, but it’s in my best interest to not have dozens of delicious goodies in my house! If I just look at it as 3-4 days (Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, New Year’s Eve & New Year’s Day) of eating away from my plan, it doesn’t seem quite as daunting. If I’m working out and eating right, the rest of the month, I’m sure I’ll be fine.
Goodbye Peri-menopause : This Wednesday, I’m finally having surgery to help with some peri-menopausal issues that I’ve had for nearly a year now. It’s outpatient surgery and requires two days of rest and two-weeks of light exercise and no swimming afterwards. If my problem is solved, this will be the best Christmas present ever! 🙂 Please keep me in your thoughts on Wednesday! 🙂
That’s about all that’s been going on in my neck of the woods. Hope all my readers are doing well! 🙂
I had my monthly weigh-in with the bariatric doctor yesterday. This month I’ve lost a total of 5.5 pounds. I’m getting very close to my original goal; so close that I’m actually only one pound away! However, I’d like to lose a total of six pounds to be at 140. These last pounds are dissolving pretty slowly, but the good news is that I have all the time in the world to get rid of them.
In other news, I’m really struggling with hunger this week. It’s right before my period (sorry for the TMI, guys) and I feel like I want to devour everything in sight. I had to grocery shop today, and I almost began crying in the car on the way home, knowing that I had to make dinner for my family. Sometimes I feel like an alcoholic sentenced to a life of bartending when it comes to being around and preparing food. Luckily, my oldest daughter pitched in and helped me by doing the side dishes while I grilled chicken. On days like today, I feel like the only way I can control my desire for copious amounts of food is to have only the blandest items in my house, and to only cook for myself–not the most realistic of solutions.
Though I’m fantastically happy with my healthier body and lifestyle, yesterday was just one of those days that I wanted to sit on the sofa with a pint of Ben & Jerry’s and a bag of chips while watching trash television. Today, I’m proud that I didn’t give in to yesterday’s desires. I worked out at for 90 minutes and made healthy food choices. I’m slowly learning that I don’t have to give in to my cravings and desires, but I also don’t have to stifle them. Feelings are there for a reason and slathering them with poor food choices and a sedentary lifestyle won’t make them go away. I’m equally proud of myself for asking for help yesterday, and proud of my daughter and son-in-law for happily giving it to me. At 50, I think it’s time that I learn to ask for help when I need it, rather than always attempting to be general manager of the universe! The one craving that I did succumb to yesterday was the trash TV. However, I drank plain mint tea as I watched the inane antics of the girls on MTV’s Teen Mom 2. At least my love of television garbage is a calorie-free vice!
How do you deal with cravings? Do you feel accomplished at asking for what you need? Tell me about it. 🙂
I promised a while back that I would post some pics of the resin crafts that I’ve been doing. I’ve also been doing a bit of needle felting. I’ve been having a heck of a time this morning with posting, so I hope this will work, since it’s my fourth try! I’m going to place all of my text together and then post the pictures.
The first few frames contain broken glass that’s either found, leftover from other projects, or purposely smashed bottles or jars that I decided to reuse instead of recycle.
The next frames contain glass stones that would normally be used in vases or with candle displays. Both of these types look really pretty either hung or propped in windows with the light shining through them.
My last picture is just a little snippet of the needle felting that I’ve been doing. My moray eel still needs teeth and some embellishments.
The best thing about crafting is that it keeps my hands out of the fridge and pantry and my mind thinking of things other than my next meal or snack! Luckily, it seems to be working because I’ve finally lost a little more weight; three more stubborn pounds!! Seven more pounds to go in order to have a BMI in the “normal” range.
I hope everyone have a magnificent weekend, and I hope you like my crafting. I’m going to hit “publish” whether, or not, the pictures post in the proper order that I’ve placed them in, because I’m really tired of this posting tool not working for me this morning! 🙂
Well, there you have it! What have all of you been up to lately? Happy Weekend!!
This post is my trip to the confessional, and you, my readers, are the priest. Before my weight loss, I had a huge problem with bingeing. HUGE. My days were planned out by what I was going to eat, and my daily goal was to consume the food I was craving by any legal means. In comparison to the other high achievers in my life, my goals were by no means lofty or important, and they certainly weren’t creating any positive changes in my world or anyone else’s.
Hiding cans of Pringles and bags of Maple Nut Goodies, making trips to Taco Bell or Chik-Fil-A, and making enormous carb-laden meals that were destined to yield bingeing leftovers, were all features in my daily routine. Top my busy schedule off with a “healthy” dose of inactivity, and it’s easy to see how I topped the scales at 223 pounds.
I’ve made a plethora of positive changes in my life over these past seven months and I’ve come clean with my counselor, and family, about my secret food binges. I’ve come to recognize that my feeding frenzies were fueled by anxiety, something that I’ve lived with most of my life, and something that I’m finally learning to manage.
I know that food is my drug of choice, and like every addict on Earth, I am not impervious to “falling off the wagon.” Because of this, I’ve created a set of guidelines to keep myself safe.
Keep only healthy foods in the house
Shun all fast food establishments
Substitute cravings with crafting, blogging, exercising, and doing activities with family and friends.
Keep my anxiety from getting the best of me through seeing my counselor, as needed, taking my medicine, and talking to trusted family and friends.
Go no more than two days in a row without exercising.
Hold myself accountable to family, friends, my doctor, and counselor if I fall back into old habits and overindulge.
99.9% of the time I follow my rules and the 70 pounds I’ve lost is my proof that it works. However, a few times, I have broken my guidelines. This weekend is a prime example. I had a big birthday party for my younger daughter on Friday. Even though she suggested all healthy food items; Chicken Satay, fresh veggie and fruit trays, cheese, olives, popcorn, and flavored unsweetened seltzers, I went a little crazy. I mean, you can’t have a birthday without cake, and popcorn isn’t that exciting of a salty snack, and what’s a party without some sort of fruity drink? By the time guests arrived there was an enormous tray of cupcakes with multi-colored frosting and sprinkles, bowls of honey roasted chipotle nuts, gummy bears, guacamole and chips, and a big vat of homemade sparkling strawberry lemon/limeade filled with fruit and plenty of sugar. These extras were in addition to my daughter’s original requests.
I had vowed to eat only the healthy offerings, and I started out doing pretty well. I even avoided the delicious homemade peanut sauce that went with the chicken. Then, I made the decision to pop just one lemony yellow gummy bear into my mouth, my first sugar in months. I wanted it to be too sweet so I’d hate it, but it wasn’t. It was magically delicious. Soon, that damn gummy bear was like a psychedelic Grateful Dead Bear swirling me into the land of gluttony. I ate a chipotle peanut; then I ate ten. I grabbed a tortilla and scooped up a mound of guacamole. I filled a 16 oz. cup to the brim with icy lemon/limeade and gulped the sugary liquid down as fast as my throat muscles would allow. Before long, I was undressing a cupcake with lovely teal frosting and shoving it into my mouth like Honey Boo Boo at a pie eating contest. By the end of the evening, I’d consumed three cupcakes, a handful of nuts and gummy bears, several servings of guac and chips, and another glass of punch. I went to bed Friday night vowing that I’d hit the gym first thing in the morning.
Saturday morning, I was exhausted. My head and joints ached and my stomach was killing me. I felt far too bad to go to the gym, and spent the first part of my day parked in front of my laptop. I attempted to eat healthy and began my day with a bowl of high fiber cereal topped with fresh blueberries and almond milk. However, an hour after I ate, I began craving the leftover treats from the day before. I began working on my glass crafting and tried to ignore the bag of gummy “gateway drug” bears tucked away in the pantry. I drank water, made a shake for lunch and popped some Tylenol for my headache and drank more water. I retreated to the patio to cut glass rings from bottles with acetone, string, fire and water. This was not a successful venture and I ended up feeding broken glass to the recycling bin and then feeding myself another cupcake. This led to a whole new binge and by the end of the evening, I’d messed up my eating plan, again.
Confession is good for the body and soul, and today is a new day. I’ve had a healthy breakfast, drank a bunch of water, and am about to go put my workout clothes on to head to the gym once my daughter gets ready. During this journey, I’ve learned that messing up isn’t permanent. I can stay on track and hold myself accountable for my choices. I’ll probably always struggle with food, but I also have tools and guidelines that give me some measure of control over it. Today, I will:
Drink plenty of water and plain green tea
Eat healthy lean protein, veggies, and fruits
Forgive myself for bingeing this weekend
Feel proud of myself for being in control
Enjoy the company of my family and friends
Stay away from the scale (far, far away!)
Do you ever binge? How do you recover after a weekend of overeating?
We celebrated the 4th yesterday because the majority of my family will be at work or the beach tonight. Plus, as of yesterday afternoon, today’s weather forecast looked pretty grim (though it’s turned out to be gorgeous).
I created our first official cookout of the season, and made the best of plans to not go too food crazy. I made a veggie tray, a huge bowl of watermelon and cantaloupe, baked beans, low-fat hamburgers and hot dogs, and my daughter made guacamole that was served with reduced fat tortilla chips. We had water or naturally flavored seltzers to drink. I even splurged and got my family a box of their favorite ice cream bars for dessert. Our old celebration, before my weight loss, would have had many of the same foods with the added bonus of homemade macaroni and cheese, bacon-laden green beans, and my famous homemade potato salad, plus potato chips, and homemade cream cheese brownies and a cake of some sort. Of course, there would have been soda and plenty of sugary iced tea or lemonade to drink. The good news is, I didn’t miss any of those old dishes, at all!
I’ve had a very busy week of exercise, and have even had more than one workout session per day several times this week. In addition to the gym, I’ve been exercising with my best friend, and with my youngest daughter. After so much activity, I felt like I’d be just fine eating what I wanted, in moderation, last night. I had a burger with just the bottom part of the bun, a small serving of beans, plenty of veggies and fruit, and for the first time in six months, I had a serving of tortilla chips with guacamole and salsa. I even joined my family in having an ice cream bar. Yes, I went way over my 200 calorie per meal/snack allotment, but I don’t feel a bit guilty. The last time I overindulged was during my vacation over a month ago. I’m learning that I’m in control of myself; that one day of not following my plan, doesn’t mean I’m going to shun it the next day.
Today, on our country’s birthday, I feel very free and independent of the guilt that I used to associate with food. I’m happily back on track and excited that the rain has stayed out of our forecast, so I can hit the hiking trail and burn off last night’s extra calories!