blogging, dealing with food cravings, Exercise, Feeling frustrated, fitness, losing weight, Maintaining Weight Loss, Medical Weight Loss Program, problem solving, setting goals, weight loss journal, Wellness Center

New Opportunities

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Sometimes you’ve just gotta have red meat! This isn’t the meal I had yesterday, but it was a lovely meal nonetheless. (Photo by me)

This week has started with some new “opportunities.”  You’ll remember in my last post that I’m trying my best to approach any stumbling block in my weight control/management as an opportunity.  My lifelong friend asthma decided to make a sneak visit  three days ago.  I did my best to use albuterol to stave it off, but ended up at urgent care yesterday and am on a five-day burst of my arch-enemy, prednisone.  Old Pred, as I call it, does a lovely job of helping me to breathe, but does a horrible number on my appetite.  In other words, I’m starving!

I’ll admit that yesterday required something that I very rarely eat; a steak–a 6 once filet to be exact.  Once, or twice, a year I get hankering for a medium, grilled and well-seasoned filet.  Usually, when I’m particularly run down. So, for lunch I indulged on 3 ounces of steak along with a plain tossed salad and a few tablespoons of plain baked sweet potato.  I boxed the other 3 ounces, along with a small serving of sweet potato and had it for dinner with some raw cucumbers.  Today, I’ve managed to stay on track with my regular Optifast plan, though it has been tough!

The asthma has also left me unable to exercise for the past three days; yet another opportunity.  I’m not really great at sitting still or at staying indoors (the humidity and pollen count in my area are horrible), but I’ve managed to entertain myself with awesome Netflix and Amazon prime entertainment.  I finished up Ken Burn’s 2014 documentary on the Roosevelt’s; which was quite good.  Then I moved on to my guilty pleasure Ru Paul’s Drag race—I love me some Queens!

My next opportunity will be this Saturday when our neighborhood hosts an awesome block party with tons of food and treats.  We’ve been in our new neighborhood a year and so many new people have moved in.  It truly will be a great opportunity to meet everyone.  My plan is to eat before the event, keep a non-calorie beverage in my hand at all times to sip on, and concentrate on social connections rather than the food.  Did I mention that I’m slated to make cupcakes for this event?  I’m so tempted to get them from the bakery so I don’t have to smell them baking!

Tomorrow, I’m back for a check-up and hopefully, I can hit the gym afterwards since it’s a stone’s throw from my doctor’s office.  I’ll be the one in the waiting room in workout clothes!

How’s everyone doing?  Any “opportunities” in your upcoming week?

 

 

blogging, Crafting to lose weight, dealing with food cravings, emotional eating, Food Addiction, losing weight, Maintaining Weight Loss, optifast, problem solving, setting goals, weight loss journal, Writing

I’ve got the Transition Blues!

Do you have a food monster in your brain?
Do you have a food monster in your brain?

You would think that I’d be thrilled to finally be eating, but I’m actually not finding it as exciting as I’d imagined.  Transition has brought back an old nemesis that I thought I’d left behind; HUNGER.I hadn’t actually felt hungry since my second week on Optifast.  Now, because my digestive system has been kicked back into action, I find myself watching the clock, waiting for my next shake, or my one meal of 4 oz. of protein and a cup of veggies.

My recent hunger  has conjured another familiar fear; food obsession.  Before my classes at the bariatric center and my time on Optifast, my waking hours were spent thinking about what I would be eating next. I’d mentally prepare meals before I ever set foot in the kitchen, and a trip to the grocery store was equivalent to a day in Disneyland. Being on Optifast briefly halted that.

Yesterday, as I drove home from the gym, I found myself mentally preparing and eating dinner.  Granted, I was mentally preparing an egg white omelet with spinach, red onion, green peppers and mushrooms–not a bad meal.  But, what frightened me was the way I was thinking about food. These were thoughts that went beyond the  normal, “Hey I’m gonna make an omelet for dinner.   It was sensory; I was seeing it, smelling it and tasting it with my massive imagination.

I turned on the radio and broke my gustatory reverie with thoughts of swimming, power walking, and recumbent elliptical conquering, but I couldn’t shake the nagging feeling that over-imagining my dinner was a problem; a diet sin that was just as bad as sneaking a piece of chocolate cake.

I’ve made so much progress, and I haven’t physically cheated on my meal plan,ever, so why do I feel guilty for thinking about my next meal, beyond regular planning? Why is their so much confusion for me where food is concerned?  Why can’t I be passé about food like “normally weighted” people seem to be?  I’ve heard my size 8 friends casually say, “Oh, gosh, no wonder I’m hungry, I forgot to eat lunch.”  I don’t propose to skip a meal, because I know that’s not good, but how does one not care enough about food to forget to eat?

Perhaps I’m worrying too much about this.  I know the proper thing to do is to make a written plan for my meals one week in advance and to enjoy them as I mindfully eat.  I also know that I have other experiences that I can replace my food thoughts with.  I can mentally plan vacations or shopping trips,  revisit fun with a friend, think about my cats, my blog, or my latest needle-felting project.  I guess I’m just wondering when it gets easy, natural, and casual?  When will I make the transition from “OMG FOOD, NOM, NOM, NOM!!!!” to ” Hmm, I think I’ll make an omelet for dinner tonight” ?

I know I’m strong and I can work through these worries.  I’ve just been sailing through this whole thing so successfully, that the return of my old way of thinking has surprised me.  I know it will get easier and that I’ll find a balance. 🙂

Do you struggle with food obsession/shame or have you conquered it? Please share your secrets in the comments. 🙂